I just purchased a new printer for my business and I was told I could get a deal if I join the Chamber of Commerce. "Cool", thought I, "I will get access to the Chamber's secret decoder rings, handshakes, and happy hour prices."

So just a few minutes ago I receive this:

"Thank you for submitting your application to join the Christian Business Chamber of Commerce as a member.

You will receive an email notice when your application has been approved. In the meantime, we encourage you to explore our website at www.thecbcc.com to find out the benefits available to you as a member and how we operate.
...
We look forward to seeing you at our monthly luncheon meeting and getting to know you better.

CBCC Board of Directors"

Ah. Not what I was expecting. Apparently, the sales guy neglected to mention the "Christian Business " part of the "Chamber of Commerce". i guess I should now seek out the Jewish and Islamic chambers, next, and do the Edward Current tactic of joining all CoC's. But now I feel as if I was...mis-lead. Like I've been baptized into Mormonism without my knowledge or the Scientologists gained access to my bank account. Still, I saved quite a bit of money, and for that complaints are softened.

And in a second email I am encouraged to use their logo on my website and go to their luncheons.
I'm in the market for a sheep suit...
Anybody else a member? If I ever get the time free to go to meetups or meetings, we could go together. :-D

Of course, now I have this nearly overwhelming desire to call the sales guy and tell him I am a fierce proponent of Islam, or something.

But hey, they have this guy...whoever he is. (That smile looks a little scary to me.)

I love their code of values. It is pure manipulation. God talked to me, and he says that he wants you to give me 10% of all your profits as a tribute in his honor - or face his wrath. Would you prefer boils, pests, or should he just take your first born?

1. GOD OWNS EVERYTHING

When we recognize that everything belongs to God and we are privileged to have the opportunity to cherish the gifts he gives us, we experience the Utmost joy and can be utilized in the best way to advance His kingdom.
(1 Chronicles 29:11), (Psalm 24:1)

2. GOD CONTROLS EVERYTHING

God is in ultimate control of EVERYTHING. None of us can do a better job by trying to take control of the outcomes ourselves. Our role is to be obedient, humble ourselves to his authority and watch him perform the miracles.
(1 Chronicles 29:12) Psalm 135:6, Isaiah 48:17)

3. EXERCISE STEWARDSHIP

We are responsible for building and operating our businesses in a way that glorifies God, produces profit and supports the work of Christ.
(1 Corinthians 4:2)

4. DEMONSTRATE A SERVANT ATTITUDE

When we work, we should work with joy, work hard, and work as if for God (See #2) We shouldn’t work this way to impress anyone but God, but when others see us, they should be impressed by our work ethic, integrity and positive attitude.
(Ecclesiastes 5:19, 2 Thes. 3:10, Acts 13:2 John 9:4 Col 3:23)

5. SEEK COUNSEL

From Scripture, Godly People, The Lord We need regular communication with God through studying scripture, prayer and other Godly people who care about our success and will hold us accountable to Him, our families and operating our businesses with integrity and success.
(Isaiah 48:17, Proverbs 12:15)

6. TREAT EMPLOYEES FAVORABLY

Our greatest opportunities to be a witness of Christ may be with employees. Just as your job or business is your God-given opportunity to serve God’s kingdom, we should encourage our employees to offer their best by involving them in the clearly communicated vision of the company for which you exercise stewardship for Him.
(Luke 10:71Tim 5:18, Job 31:13-14)

7. LEAD LIKE JESUS

We are all leaders. Our faith dictates we lead by the greatest example who ever walked on the earth—Jesus Christ. Christ was the ultimate SERVANT LEADER! Jesus had the right HEART (purpose), HEAD, (leadership philosophy), Hands (Impact on others), and HABITS (daily walk). He had a clear VISION (his Father's) and then clearly communicated, empowered and motivated those around him to uphold that vision that was greater than his own.
(Matthew 20:26-28, Romans 12:2, Matthew 4:9)

8. DEVELOP YOUR GOD-GIVEN TALENTS

Each of us has unique talents. God designed us that way for a reason. We should find opportunities to use those strengths to serve the Lord.
(Duet 8:18)

9. PRACTICE THE GOLDEN RULE

The Golden Rule should not be exercised so that you can have others treat you favorably, but as a means of considering how you should treat others. Think of the other person’s point of view by putting yourself in his shoes and reflecting upon how you would receive your own actions.
( Philippians 2:3, Romans 13:9, Matt 7:12, Luke 6:31)

10. GIVE GENEROUSLY

Since everything belongs to God, this is an acknowledgment of that. Giving should not be done out of obligation, but as a form of worship. Give not only your financial resources, but your talents, time, and God-given resources.

I didn't see the scriptural explanations on their front page, but i got a little tick in my eye while reading the "Values" Is god owning everything a "value"? It seems they're conflating separate definitions of the word

If god owns everything, then why did I have to buy a printer?! Can't he lend me one for my comparatively short lifetime? And some paper. And toner. And a house, car, girlfriend, money, food, movie tickets, space ship, diving equipment, and so on. I'll give them back when finished.

Ok, I'm confused.

When buying the printer, it just said "Chamber of Commerce", and not the "Christian Chamber of Commerce"?

Then after they got your money, then they tell you they're the Christian Chamber of Commerce?

Something's wrong with this picture.

Whose Chamber of Commerce did it say you'd be joining? San Antonio, U.S., or just some "Chamber of Commerce?

What's the name of the company who sold you the printer?

What's the name of the website you bought it through?

No, the sales guy said if I "joined the Chamber of Congress" i could use their buying power to get a reduced price: as I am currently a one person, multiple services operation this suited me fine (recording studio, short-run CD duplication). He said that if I decided to go ahead with the transaction, he'd take care of the CoC's paperwork. I didn't fill out any of the CBCoc forms: the sales guy did, so that is a bit on the down-low.

It is possible he said "Christian" the very first time he asked "are you a member of..." when we first spoke on the phone, and I, having been part of the Junior JC's long ago and far away, just excised the word from my hearing and assumed it was the SA CoC. However, I am certain when I purchased the printer, that the term Christian BCoC was never used.

Also, the dealer (Copy Products of San Antonio) doesn't show affiliation (either CBCoC or SA CoC, and so on) on their website or sales receipt. I bought the printer in person: the sales guy wasn't the most technically knowledgeable (he knew the tech specs, but didn't have the dog and pony show down well enough for a techie like me), but he had a good IT guy who knew his stuff and showed that the printer is capable of doing what I need it to do.

So the sales guy just put me on the CBCoC's docket to get the sale by getting me a decent price. And I just realized I'm going to get spam...er...event emails from them.